Why We Left California for New Zealand.

The Why!

On a hot June afternoon in 2022, my family packed into our minivan for the very last time. The car was stuffed with luggage, the kids were buzzing with excitement, and beneath my own smile was a mix of nerves, relief, and disbelief. We weren’t just heading to the airport, we were leaving California for good.

This wasn’t a decision we made overnight. For years, the idea of starting fresh in another country had hovered in the background of our conversations. At first, it was a joke whispered over late-night news coverage. “What if we just moved to New Zealand?” But the more the world shifted around us, the less it sounded like a joke and the more it began to feel like a lifeline.

The Long Goodbye

In the months before our departure, we stripped our lives down to the essentials. Furniture, cars, toys, even the silverware, gone. What we carried forward fit into our suitcases, each of us choosing what mattered most. There’s something sobering about realizing how little of your life actually comes with you when you cross an ocean.

We said goodbye to friends, family, and familiar routines. Grocery stores we knew by heart. Freeway exits we could drive blindfolded. The Southern California sun that blazed down on every soccer game and Costco run. These things fade quickly once you leave, but at the time, the goodbyes felt endless.

The Search for Calm

The spark that set this whole journey in motion actually started back in 2016. Like many Americans, we watched the political and social climate shift dramatically, and it rattled something deep in us. Safety, tolerance, even truth itself felt like they were eroding. We didn’t want to raise our children in a place where lockdown drills were a part of school life, or where division seemed to grow sharper by the day.

So we researched. Portugal made the list, but the thought of tackling Portuguese with three kids was daunting. Again and again, New Zealand rose to the top of our searches, not because it was perfect, but because it seemed calm.

In 2019, we finally went for a “scouting trip.” The first thing we noticed was the absence of a constant undercurrent of fear. No one carried guns into supermarkets. Schools felt safe. People walked with ease. It wasn’t paradise, but it was calm, and for us, that was everything.

The Pandemic Pause

Of course, then the world shut down. Like everyone else, we pressed pause, staying inside our four walls and waiting out the uncertainty. But even during that global stillness, our plan quietly took root. We researched, planned, and reminded ourselves of that breath of calm we’d felt in New Zealand.

When borders reopened, we knew it was time.

Starting Over

By June 2022, we were ready, or at least as ready as you can ever be for a move like this. Leaving behind a lifetime of familiarity isn’t simple, but it was necessary. We didn’t shed our old lives recklessly, but intentionally, with hope leading the way.

Now, when I think back to that last drive to LAX, I remember the heat of the sun through the window and the weight of what we were doing. I also remember holding my daughter’s hand a little too tightly, not out of fear, but out of love and determination.

Because sometimes the bravest thing you can do for your family is not to stay, but to go.